Ok I’ve got to start off with a bit of cheese because it’s necessary; sending a big shoutout to everyone who’s read, commented, emailed, tweeted, liked, followed and messaged us and/or our posts so far; we’ve acknowledged all of you and are really appreciative. The response has been overwhelming and we’re pleased that you’re enjoying the blog. We’ll be sure to keep you edutained on a regular basis and have some surprises down the line, so stay tuned. If you haven’t already, please join our facebook page “Brothers With No Game” and follow us on Twitter at www.twitter.com/TheBWNG. You can email us at thebwng@gmail.com.
Back to the Blog…Somewhere in our comprehensive ‘questions nobody really knows the answers to’ list just after “What is the meaning of life?” and a few places before “Who is Drake waving at with his hand during performances?” lies one of the greatest riddles of all time…all time. What do Women Want?
As a man, to answer that question would be impossible; not because I don’t know (although I don’t) but because a lot of women themselves don’t know what they want. Women have an idea or dream of what they want but I couldn’t count how many times I’ve seen some of their realities and possibilities sway towards their needs and cravings which tend to never co-exist with their wants.
Yet where women may not always know what they want, they sure as hell know what they like from men (assurance, independence, security, attraction, protection, independence, fun, humour, sensitivity, confidence etc). All these clichéd themes create aphrodisiacs for a woman.
These same aphrodisiacs have been in place for yeeears and have come in the form of material and mental and physical attributes. Some have remained the same type of aphrodisiac while others have upgraded a notch. Here’s just a few clichéd but still relevant turns-ons for a woman…Signs of the Aphrodisiac.
The Suit
Nothing outside of Sex and The City reruns and designer shoes keeps a woman’s eyes glued more than a brother in a suit. You could be attending a wedding, work or court; you wear the suit right and she’ll be staring. There’s something about our aura and our confidence that shines through and the ladies love it; we know we look good because we start walking with prestige and at a steady pace so that our shoes clap in unison with the pavement. We look at our watch for the time (even though the clock at the train station is right in front of us) just so that our blazer sleeve falls back showing a glimpse of the cufflinks; our favourite stance becomes the ‘legs shoulder length apart with our hands in each pocket’.Yeah I know. HOWEVER the upgraded aphrodisiac for women comes in the style of suit you wear.
70% of guys doing a 9-5 wear suits so it’s not like a woman doesn’t see it on a daily basis, this is why the cut of the suit is important. If it’s tailored perfectly towards your frame, she’s watching!! Stray away from those Steve Harvey suits circa 1996 though, even the best of men can’t pull off those colours, looking like a damn skittle.
Deep Voice
Reciting extracts from a Gordon Brown autobiography is the most boring sh*t a person let alone woman would want to hear; reciting extracts from a Gordon Brown autobiography in a deep voice is still boring as hell but would inherit attention for a little bit longer.
Not a necessity but definitely an aphrodisiac; a deep voice suggests masculinity which further suggests protection…in reality it can be further from the truth but by tradition it serves as what women like. They know it and we know it, that’s why our voice goes all baritone when on the phone to a woman and back to high again when with our boys and even higher when we are greeted by our boy’s mum. What works heavily in a man’s favour is that we put on this Barry White facade late at night; when added to the fact that we become naturally tired, our voice takes on new levels of deep. Women dig those late night talks with a deep voice, Giggs is having a bloody field day.
Cologne
Never underestimate the importance of smell; it is often the get out clause of the five senses. A man can have average looks (see) a dislike for public displays of affection (touch) tolerable lack of foreplay (taste) and could even have the voice of Chris Tucker (hear) but if he smells like a damp washing towel he stands no chance whatsoever with a woman unless she smells like hot dog water herself.
Cologne heightens a woman’s senses; when we sport the right smell and walk past a woman in the street she is fighting herself not to turn around to see the man behind the aftershave. If she likes what she sees she’s now wondering what you sound like, what’s your personality, what are you like in bed? Of course much like the suit scenario a man’s aftershave game is only heightened if it stands out from the rest. Mandom Tip: When you reach over her shoulder in a random scenario, your aftershave will have told a story through her reaction and facial expression.
Evidence-induced ambition
A man with a plan is certified gold; you ask our female counterparts the top 5 things they want in a man and ambition (or a job) will be up there hands down!! This aphrodisiac has been upgraded in recent times. It used to be the case where just saying you had a plan was enough to entice a woman
You: I got a plan
Her: I’m enticed
But thanks to all the ‘CEOs’ ‘Founders’ and Entrepreneurs who have over-satirized the ambition market, the plan must come with substantial evidence of progress or potential.
You: I got a plan
Her: Is that plan feasible? What’s your market? Who are your competitors? Do you have financial backing? How do you differentiate from your field? What steps have you taken so far? Have you set up meetings? Have you created a media pack for advertisers? What’s your five year plan? Have you built a team?
You: uhm…I got a plan
The ideas garner her interest; measured action is what she locks onto. When she hears answers to those types of questions before she even asks them, she latches onto the vision and thinks ahead…security, confidence, and assurance. These thoughts are a tool for her aphrodisiacism (not a real word but would wipe the floor with opponents on scrabble). Of course having evidence-induced ambition gives brothers a healthy perspective into who is interested in their potential and who is interested in their potential bank account.
Swagger
Countless times you may hear different women say “there’s something about him, I just can’t put my finger on it”….its the swagger. Swagger is that unexplainable aura of a brother that women can’t get enough of; it’s something you can’t teach, you just have it. The way we go about our business, the way we stay relevant without forcing attention, the way we define ourselves as men through maturity….it’s all directly linked to our swag…and there’s always one woman watching….the one who wants to take that extra step to get to know you….you’re her aphrodisiac.
Tall, Tailored Dark, Diverse & Handsome
Of all the cliches that still stand, the tall, dark and handsome theory seems the least practiced. A shorter man with a good job gets love too…he looks tall when he stands on his wallet. A woman now likes their man tailored a.k.a suited to the world. A man can never be content with who he is or what he has but if he is comfortable in his own skin, what he wants and has the right intentions for those around him, he is tailored for success….and women.
Dark has been replaced by diverse; women are more open to different kinds of men, from the crazy to the quiet. They may have their preference but welcome change and have a sudden urge for something new.
Handsome will always be a woman’s aphrodisiac until the end of time. It’s an authentic term defining distinct attributes that stand out. Universally understood and visually stimulating for a woman, your level of handsome is the fine line between her making you breakfast in bed or taking you to Mcdonalds for a bacon and Egg McMuffin (not that it’s a bad thing but I know which one I’d prefer).
There you have it, 6 signs of the disiac, part 2 featuring 6 signs from the male perspective is coming this week. So! What else turns a woman on? What turns a woman off? Brothers and Sisters, hit us up!
I’m gone like Whitney Houston’s voice
JC
Loooooooool @ I got a plan! It’s like a job interview or tryna get a business loan with the bank. Ladies wanna be all up in a brothers business. peep how I psych myself up and rehearse all my lines and answers before I move to her!
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Lol I agree Jide, the I got a Plan had me laughing too. Nice on JC.
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All spot on but “Evidence-induced ambition” = REALEST THING EVER!!!!
“I got a plan” doesn’t cut it anymore. Why? Because that bar gets recycled more times than a metro during rush hour. Yet, like the metro still slumped and folded on the seat behind you on your journey home after a long day at work, so often these “plans” never make it to a viable destination.
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spot on my fellow brother
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First off, I absolutely love this post – ‘I have a plan’ had me laughing so hard – it’s so true and as a female, I’ve heard it oh so many times! Guys should know though that if you’re moving to an intelligent girl we can tell if your ‘plan’ is constructed to impress us and we can also definitely pick a lot of holes in it if we have an ounce of business knowledge
so sometimes you do damage to your own game trying to talk a lot of business shit you don’t really know about – just makes you come off like a massive moron!
Oh, also if you’re talking about the ways in which you’re going to make yourself a valuable business proposition as a rapper and you’re going to conquer the world etc etc and YOU’RE WACK AND CAN’T RAP, we’ve heard your music… not a good look. At all. You do get points for being ambitious and that’s sexy in itself, but being deluded is not attractive at all.
Coincidentally, me & my friend Hayley were having the ‘what women want’ conversation a few nights ago – a few things we came up with that you forgot were:
- Creativity.. we love guys in bands, for example..
- Good dress sense… kinda comes under swagger.. but I know a guy with AMAZING dress sense, he’s not the best looking guy in the world but I would. Just because he always wears the freshest shit.
- Intelligence… guys that don’t/can’t read = not hot. In the words of my friend “I cannot date a stupid moron who speaks and types in text speak.”
- Family-oriented… he doesn’t have to be a mummy’s boy or anything, preferably not! but you know as Andrea Martin says “you can’t trust a man who don’t treat his mama right”
There’s so many more things that we came up with but I think they’re actually deeply offensive to men.. and shouldn’t be posted publically on the internet, so I’ll leave it at the above
P.S This is probably my favourite blog ever.
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Anthony Reply:
March 11th, 2011 at 4:59 pm
@Kimberley, What are these offensive things? Ignorance isn’t attractive either!
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A tailored diverse handsome man with a deep voice and swagger, who wears suave suits and a sexy colonge and has ambition (not just a plan!) Sounds like Mr. Right! Brothers with no Game hook a sister up!
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Evry Reply:
December 4th, 2010 at 6:19 pm
@Autumn Rose, I agree lol, HOOK ME UP!
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I love the style of writing JC!
I also agree with most of the comments above and I have to say ‘Evidence -induced ambition’ is hard to come by. Definitely feeling the characterised summary of Tailored, Diverse and Handsome, because that is the truth. I spoke to one of the girlies about this and when I posed the question ‘What do women want’? She shot back an answer with ‘ Men who can rock the right shoes’ LOOOOL
On the superficial side: As a man, your suit should be accompanied by some sharp shoes
On a real note: All of the above in balance and yes definitely family orientated.
Love the blog guys x
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Check, check, check…! A man in a suit smelling divine is VERY attractive. A deep voice just adds to the ruggedness or a real MAN! Times have moved on, the nation has become more entrepreneurial, more business minded so yes, to simply say “I have a plan” does not cut it! “I have a plan” could mean, “I’m 30 and still trying to make it as an MC, hitting the studio today” … err no, please find some real ambition… As for swagger, I still can’t define what swagger is, but if the guy has that “je ne sais quoi” then yes that too is attractive. I love tall, dark and handsome man (gosh I’m sooo cliche!) but in more recent years the overt diversity and clear individuality of men has made such men more appealing because of their confident attitude. Really and truly it doesn’t REALLY matter if the guy’s tall dark and handsome, in a suit and smelling like the latest Hugo Boss advert… a good wholesome man is a good man whatever he looks like so unless there’s substance, that’s a wasted shell of a man!
Looking forward to the female version of this! X
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Careful with the swagger; arrogance is pas sexy. Where is the ability to argue? I might be out on one here, but it is hugely important that the banter is sharp. I cannot be attracted to someone who doesn’t rip the piss out of me.
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You forgot ‘FAITH’ a man who loves the Lord is attractive too..thats a definite disiac..
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Y Reply:
November 23rd, 2010 at 8:58 pm
@N, I SOOOOOO AGREEE WITH THIS X10000000000 %
NOTHING LIKE A MAN WITH FAITH THAT LOVES THE LORD…THE SPIRITUAL ONLY UNDERSTAND THE SPIRITUAL….NOW THATS A BLESSING…LOL
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Hilarious! once again! Great stuffs!! ‘Evidence induced ambition” ahaha this is very true though LOOL!
Well truth speaks lies stutter ” (uhm) i got a plan”. “Looking like a damn skittle “ahahaha. ps, you ending one liners are too funny, i am still laughing at the Coleen Rooney one you wrote ages ago!
BWNG keep pushing guys enjoying it all!!
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i’ve definitely noticed how women change at work when i rock a tailored suit, it’s almost the reverse of the superman effect, Do women really like Clark Kent??
anyways, great post and am definitely looking forward to part 2, so much so that i wrote my own response to this “what men want” check it out please guys and leave your thoughts.
http://tinyurl.com/34um64o
@writewrongz
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am i the only one who likes a mid height (am 5 7.5, so he has to be at least 5.8 but no more than 6 foot!), lightskinned man, i dont really care much about the deep voice (as long as he doesnt sound more feminine than I do!). what you all missed out is the fact that a guy who can make you laugh (or at the very least has the same level of humour as you) is very important. i have been with a guy who physically wasnt my type but the sense of humour had me laughing everyday till i realised what i had!
but above all, i like a guy who annoys me ever so slightly (most girls i know do too), its mainly because they disagree with my opinion and am thinking how dare you. its true what they say, forget compliments, the best way to get a girls attention is to give her a backhanded compliment like “i like your earrings, my grandma has something similar “or “nice hair is it real!”. go on guys try it!!!! its works lol
in the style of BWNG, am gone like Beyonce’s hairline (its shocking)!!!! lol
p.s cant wait for the next blog, hurry, works boring!!!!
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I’ve got to say this is so on point! well done JC (yes I realise I am extremely late)
Ambition with direction is definitely necessary, I’ve dated people in the past that tried to come with that I have a plan nonsense which no foundation…FAIL
Intelligence is the greatest diasiac for me, definitely like someone that can challenge me and keeps up with current affairs other than the latest hip hop album or kicks although that said, it is ESSENTIAL to come across well put together, Invest in a tailored suit, smell good trust me it makes all the difference in terms of initial attraction.
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