One of our readers forwarded me the funniest tweet I have seen in a while, so much so that I had to write a quick blog about it.

“@Presid3tialUK: #YourAScumbag when ur regularly f**kin a girl u would neva b caught dead on tha street wit”

21st century twitter spelling aside,  my reaction was like:

but I know a lot of brothers were more like:

because this tweet touched a few nerves and told some home truths.

After all the laughter and banter, it hit me that this is actually something that happens regularly around us, which led me to write this post, one with more questions than answers, because I can honestly say that the whole concept of stealth-sexing bewilders me. All I can do is give examples of relationships that never made sense to me, and then maybe our readers can explain the science behind it.

Things that never made sense to me:

Teenage Tag-a-long

As a young man, I encountered my first stealth-sex couples. Walking down the road as a teen I started to notice a trend of brothers down the street on their mobile phones, walking at a rapid pace and three paces behind them is usually the quiet girl in the class -who nobody spoke to, but everyone thought if ever times got hard she might get the vitamin D. From then I realised that brothers had the potential to deceive from a young age. The mobile phone and the distance in front was a decoy, because every sharp corner they took the girl followed.

Even young Drake isn’t fooled by that stunt.

The out of town Hotel rendezvous

Dudes paying over the odds to take a girl into the countryside barn Bed and Breakfast to avoid encountering anyone they know. I know this because I once went to a work do in the countryside once, and we stayed in a hotel deep in the middle of nowhere. Now on the guestbook I saw “Thank You from Jamal and Rebecca, dated 15th February 2009”. Looking at the demographic of the area, I know there couldn’t possibly be a Jamal within a 40 mile radius, so my suspicion was that the brother scoured the earth to find tranquility from the hood in middle England.

Avoiding eye Contact

One thing that is guaranteed between two black men is eye contact. No matter where you are in the world when you see another black person or ethnic minority, brothers tend to at least have eye contact followed by “you cool bro?”, as a sign to show that we’re in this struggle together part of the man code. Now when a brother is with a chick that he is not comfortable to be seen with, they can quickly turn into Steve Wonder and start to look for visual answers around you –anywhere but to make eye contact-.

Brothers riding low in the passenger seat

I always found it suspect that some dudes roll their seats so far back with New Era caps covering their eyes, particularly when they are riding in the passenger seat of a chick’s car. Maybe I am reaching (trying to prove something that is not there) here, I don’t know but the girl might aswell have a built in mattress so he can lay down.

“… just a link…”

There is no excuse for a brother to be ashamed of a woman when he makes it 100% clear that she is just a link.

With chicks going on like this brothers are going to continue playing the Heskey role looking for a trophy chick who are nothing more than a link to another man.

#Sadness!

Highlighting these scenarios has simply provided more questions than answers, so I thought I would get some level of contribution from the readers through a poll in order to remain anonymous, I have a feeling that men aren’t the only culprit in this. I truly believe there are women out there getting Vitamin D from underground pharmacists.

The questions I have for the readers are as follows (click on link, it will disappear after completion)

Poll for women

Poll for Men

In general I would like to read peoples comments on why people either have stealth-sex partners, or any experiences / examples of Stealth lovers you might know. I leave you with this quote from a rapper Saigon: – “If we are all sleeping with dimes, then who is getting the ugly chicks pregnant?”

The Yak