My man JC posed this question to me just the other day out of the blue (maybe next week he’s going to tell me he’s soon to be a father) which got my mind ticking:

“What things do you think are most important to tell your daughter as a father?”

I thought damn, that’s an incredibly random but good question, hmmmm. What knowledge have I acquired whilst on earth which will be essential for me to pass on to my children? or have I just been wandering around doing nothing all these years? I pondered and after a little brainstorm I thought I would share these random thoughts I had.

Regular readers who have already read my ’5 Lies My Mother Told Me’ post would tell me how well I would fair at “keeping it real” so here’s things I will tell my daughter:

My daughter will inherit this expression from me on fidgety guys

“Believe half of what you see, None of what you hear”

I will try to deliver this message in as subtle a manner as possible so she doesn’t go to extremes of being unable to trust anyone, and miss out on the youthful bliss of believing in say the tooth fairy and santa for more than 3 years (after that I’m snitching). Its the moral which is more important in this case as I would want her to understand people must be judged by what they do not what they say. Men lie…Women lie and you probably will too so get over it and avoid lying to yourself and it’s all good. This lesson will have revision sessions over the years covering subjects like:

Why men lie for the booty
(Believe none of what you hear)

Why those 10 bottles on his table or the BMW he’s driving doesn’t necessarily mean he has money
(Believe half of what you see)

“You are what you eat watch”

All forms of reality TV are bad for you, these include Big Brother and Love and Hip-Hop (I’m going with the premise that Big Brother will STILL be on when my daughter arrives, that show just wont die). ‘Keeping up with the *insert whatever new woman who’s famous for sex tapes name here*‘ is the worst type and probably will cause minor loss of brain cells. These kind of shows depicting famous and supposedly “succesful” people just living their lives or doing absolutely nothing should be watched with caution and under no circumstance should you believe being a bimbo with curves and Double D’s or a rich mans side chick/baby mother aka The Emily is a good career choice. Ok maybe I watched the full series a few episodes but I’m a social commentator so its research (if anybody tells me she’s a stylist I will not respond).

These women have very little to teach you unless you want to be that woman in the club beefing another chick in the rave whilst giving the guys a free preview of your underwear.

“Love yourself first”

Self explanatory. Love and respect yourself at all times and it will be very difficult for you to be hated or disrespected by others. People will only treat you how you allow yourself to be treated and not much more can be said.

Remember this?

“Leggings are not real trousers”

I want her to understand this from an early age even though she will not be allowed to leave the house in leggings which are not covered by something else over the buttocks region anyway. At BWNG we have said many times we like when some women wear them, in fact we love it and makes one smile; however due to leggings abuse from certain sections of the public which can only make one frown or cry even, I will not promote leggings as trouser use in public places. Its very revealing so you shouldn’t be dressing like that at a young age anyway and I wouldn’t want strangers believing that budget cuts by parents at home means they can’t buy you real trousers, next they will expect me to send you in with plimsolls on too.

“Never get relationship advice from other women”

I should say rarely but I will say never as people rarely listen to what they are being told anyway. Its a very bad idea to ask women what they think of your relationship if trying to understand a man’s behaviour. Better to ask a man, however….

“90% of your male friends want to sleep with you”

So try to get that advice from a stranger or someone who you can totally trust despite the statistical difficulty. Its just the way it is and the way of men; you can try to be more optimistic about your male friends and I’ll respect you if you’re amish or living on the outskirts of new age societies like a tribe in the amazon somewhere (even the though the fact they are always half naked makes me sceptical). I’m going off on a tangent, bottom line she is just going to need to trust ME.

“Be careful who you lay with”

This is a lesson which will come later on in life and will be the most challenging yet most serious conversation. Ideally I should leave it to her mother but just incase I’m needed I’ll be on hand to pass on some pearls of wisdom. I will inform her to refrain from casual sex and cause; ASHEWO is not part of our family tradition; BUT if you ever do slip as your only human always use your head AS WELL AS your heart whenever possible. Maybe I should just try to remix the message video below. Its a cold world out there

I will tell her much more of course one day when I have evolved from BWNG to father (god willing) but these are the ones I thought to share.

Don Kwelu

BWNG readers do you agree? What pearls of wisdom will you share for your daughters and sons when she arrives? Parents what advice have you given to your sons and daughters?